10 Reasons I hate nature

1. Animals go extinct after a while, and it is sad.

2. Paper is much nicer to write on than trees.

3. Nature smells bad.

4. Nature tastes bitter.

5. Deer are stupid and birds get stuck in jet engines.

6. Artificial Christmas trees do not burn your house down (most of the time).

7. Flowers die eventually…plastic flowers are forever beautiful, and they smell like plastic.

8. Sharks eat people while they are swimming naked in the ocean at night.

9. Chipmunks look cute, but are actually almost as vicious as a cornered wolverine.

10. Too much oxygen can cause a normal adults lungs to explode unexpectedly.